Inked
by Faulty Paragon
Summary: AU. Neptune is living a typical college life- juggling part-time jobs, pining over a girl, and doing homework. He's terrified of having to move back home if he can't make his tuition payment despite student loans. So how can he take care of (at least) one problem? Enter Sun Wukong. AKA in which Neptune gets married for the best (and worst) of reasons. Seamonkeys, Iceberg, BlackSun.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is a short fic that was inspired by a funny writing prompt entertaining enough for me to want to make a whole fic about it. This piece will be fairly short, but it does take place in the _Thrown to the Wind _canon. You don't need to read that fic first in order to understand this one, although if you enjoy Arkos, you might like _TttW_.

Chapters for this, just like in _TttW, _will be around 1000 words each, just to challenge myself to keep things succinct.

Let me know what you think!

* * *

Inked

It was in times like these that Neptune wondered yet again whether it would be worth it to just pack his bags and become a sheep herder like he'd always dreamt of becoming. Quiet atmosphere, nice farm life, sheltered countryside girls that would fall in love with his clumsy city-boy ways. The farther away from Beacon U., the better.

Or maybe he could be a small-town cop, someplace the sheriff was the law and credentials weren't needed to apply. That way, he could have a badge and a gun and a fancy moustache, and no one would judge him for it because he'd be idealized. Ladies loved a man in uniform, right?

Or maybe he'd just start working in a better coffee shop- something quainter, something less commercial. A mom-and-pop joint at the corner of the street, perhaps, with hanging plants in the windows and a little grime on the sills that everyone seemed to ignore. Maybe once he traded in his green Starbucks apron for a more hipster haircut, he would find himself some wealthy influencer girlfriend who would fall in love with his latte art, and he'd get to live his life out going on adventures with her forever.

As his mind slipped in and out of different fantasies, his eyes focused back in onto the glaring number pasted smack-dab in the middle of his screen. It was far greater than just a few tens of thousands of Lien.

_I'm never going to graduate. God, I'm never going to get into fourth year if I can't even pay for this year... Why are international tuition fees so much?_

He had a month to find the money. Just one month to figure out how in the world he was going to have enough Lien to basically put down a fucking down-payment for a house- of course, that money would be swallowed up by Beacon's Financial Office without a second thought. _At least I don't have to worry about paying rent, _he thought glumly. His dingy apartment with his best friend was paid for till the end of the school year thanks to his job as an RA, but there was only so much dry cereal and microwave mac-and-cheese a guy could take in his life.

Letting out a tiny whimper of protest, he slammed his laptop shut and packed up his belongings. He could practically hear the chiding condescension of his mother, her advice that he should just, "settle for going to Vacuo," ringing through his mind. It mocked him in his plight, and he needed to do something to drown it out or he was going to lose his mind.

Amidst the din of the general student population buzzing around between classes, no one was paying attention to the sour grimace on his face. It was still the middle of the day. With classes in full swing still, everyone was rushing about through the main student centre without sparing him a second glance, giving him ample time to run calculations in his mind. Maybe if he cut back here- stopped going out there- saved up that-

No matter what calculations he ran, however, nothing was going to make this better.

With angry, sharp motions, he slung his backpack over his shoulder, shoved his hands into his pockets, and began to mope his way to the nearest printing centre. He had a paper to print out for the next day, and there was no point putting it off while he waited for his friend.

As he rounded the corner to the lobby, however, he caught long, silvery hair out of the corner of his eye. Instantly, he felt some of the tension in his neck ease. "Well, hello there, ladies," he cooed, flashing his most brilliant smile at the quartet of young woman walking towards him.

Their reactions were just as expected- Blake waved calmly, Yang grinned, and Ruby's face lit up at the sight of any and all familiar faces, as always.

And, as usual, Weiss' cheeks darkened ever so slightly, and he felt his heart begin to race.

It was amazing to see how the girls who had shared his English class in their first year were still so close to one another. Yet, despite having spent almost every Saturday morning with the girl for years, thanks to the shenanigans of their friend group (why they couldn't still play video games in lecture halls, he'd never know, but he would never be upset at the chance to sit thigh-to-thigh pressed against Weiss at their courtyard picnic tables while playing board games instead) he still hadn't made his move.

Sage told him he was pathetic. Scarlet simply tutted annoyingly every time Weiss left, as if to show his disapproval that she was leaving with Neptune by her side.

At least Sun never made fun of him. His roomie, his best bro, his confidant, always had his back.

Bringing his attention back to the girls, he sent them a suave grin, eyes quickly scanning the crowd to land onto Weiss. "So. Anything new?"

"Why don't you tell us?" Yang replied cheerily, slapping a hand against his back in a friendly greeting.

Instantly, Neptune doubled over in pain. "Watch the shoulder, Yang!" he winced, recoiling away from the blonde.

Ruby's eyes widened like silver saucers. "Woah, you weren't kidding," she murmured to Yang.

Her sister simply leered, a mischievous glint in her eye. "I can't believe you and Sun actually got them done." She whistled appreciatively. "Matching dude-bro tattoos? You've gotta let us see them sometime."

Desperate to save face in front of Weiss, whose expression was a mix between mirthful and utterly unimpressed, Neptune straightened up and chuckled through his pain, "I'm sure you want to get us both shirtless, but ladies, please-"

Blake cut him off, the girl flipping long black hair over her shoulder. "We'll let you know if we're going to the Winter Formal, but probably not."

Neptune pouted. He had been planning the dormitory's Winter Formal for weeks with the other RAs- how could his favourite residents not show up? "But what could possibly stop you from coming to-"

"My father's decided to throw a gala that evening," Weiss explained. To his surprise, she was almost apologetic. "I need to attend."

And just like that, Neptune's heart fell into his boots. The four women waved and walked away, leaving him to trudge through the busy hallways alone, nothing but a smarting ache on his shoulder and the disappointment that Weiss wouldn't go with him to the Formal the only things left to accompany him on his voyage to meet up with his roommate.

At least Sun could commiserate in some way. His shoulder probably hurt, too- their tattoos were still pretty fresh.

_Fuck. I still have to figure out how to pay tuition. _

It wasn't a great day for Neptune. Maybe that sheep herder idea held water, after all.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Hope you're all holding up with the social distancing! Stay healthy :)

Let me know what you think!

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Inked

Neptune was a lucky guy. His life, in general, wasn't bad at all- no big disasters nor worries plagued his days, aside from the regular bills and dating failures. However, the increasingly erratic texts he was receiving from his roommate were more than enough cause for concern in his point of view.

Sun usually was never with his phone, unless they were on duty at the desk for the night. And yet, here Neptune was, getting a million and one messages from Sun, each one as cryptic as the last. They mostly consisted of streams of GIF sets, all coming down to one key message: _we're fucked, dude._

Neptune sighed, neatly putting his freshly-printed paper into his backpack. Tucking his hands into his pockets, he slipped out of the student printing centre and began sauntering towards where Sun had asked him to meet earlier. Apparently, neither of them had had a victory that day.

As numerous students darted around him, his mind strayed back to Weiss. He had literally known her for years now, and ever since the beginning, he had thought she was beautiful. There was this grace around her; a pristine aura that probably came with coming from such a wealthy upper-class family.

At least, that was what Sage and Scarlet always told him. His other roommates from back in his first year at Beacon had always laughed at his not-so-secret crush on the pale, petite woman, saying that she was too good for him.

If only that was why Neptune had feelings for her. As he strode through the student centre, sneaking little snacks off of tables at booths for clubs he'd never sign up for along the way, he couldn't help but think back glumly on all the times he had spent with her. Weiss was pretty, yes- but she was also insanely witty. She was clumsy, and crude, and she tried to cover it all up with this whole 'heiress' schtick, but he wasn't buying it. He never had.

He liked her anyways.

_Fuck it, whatever. She's not coming to the Formal. _

What a shitty day.

Finally, he found himself at their meeting point. Neptune's eyes fell upon the giant poster hung by the Financial Advising Office's doorway. _Are you eligible for a tax break on tuition? _the sign asked in bold yellow and blue lettering. _Do you and your partner qualify? Make sure to speak with our Financial Advisors and find out!_

"Yeah, no thanks," Neptune grumbled. "Single dude with single taxes, here."

_…Weiss doesn't even need to worry about tuition, huh?_

He sighed, slipping into an empty chair near the FAO's doorway. He shifted in his seat, pulling out a granola bar he had snuck away from the Beacon Boarding Club's booth on his way there. Munching on the chocolate and pecan, he unlocked his phone again, sending a message to Sun.

-_Bruh, I'm here_

It barely took a second for the other to reply. And, just as promised in his message, Sun strutted out of the FAO a minute later, looking every bit like the surfer boy he wanted to be with a smoothie in hand. Neptune grinned fondly at his best friend, shaking his head ruefully when the other man stretched, his shirt lifting so that his defined abs were visible underneath. Two passing girls shared an impressed smile which was not unnoticed by either boy; unfortunately, Sun promptly ruined the moment by shooting finger guns at them both, firing off a pathetic wink. "Hello, ladies," he murmured.

Instantly, the two women rolled their eyes and walked away.

Neptune's smile grew as he watched his best friend slump, shuffling over in his jeans shorts towards Neptune. Sun moaned, "Man, I almost got'em."

"Maybe you should work on your moves, man. How do you think Blake is gonna love that kind of loser?"

Sun pulled a silly face toward him, rolling his eyes- but the tinge on his cheeks was clear. Neptune smiled- it was no secret that Sun had a fondness for Blake. Why else hadn't he written up her for all the weed she brought into the dorms?

Gesturing towards the office door, Neptune changed the subject. "So. Why did we meet here? Doesn't your class normally end in the Earth & Forestry building? Did something go wrong with your loans?"

Sun sighed melodramatically. "See, bro," he murmured loftily, "I happened to get a lovely email today."

"About the tuition increase?" Neptune deadpanned.

At those words, Sun's whole demeanor shifted. "Yeah, man! I can't afford that!"

"I know!" The two young men huffed simultaneously and began walking towards the student centre's exit, ready to go to the dorm's cafeteria.

"At least you'll be fine," Sun mumbled. "Your other job pays tips." With the most sincere look, he asked, "You'll be able to cover it with those, right?"

Neptune snorted bitterly. "Well yeah, but twelve Lien split between three people per shift isn't exactly useful in the education department… so yeah." He paused, waving to one of his friends across the hall as they sprinted past to their next class. Once that was done, he finished, "To answer your question, I'm kind of fucked indeed."

"Shit, man…"

The two of them wandered out of the building and down the large front steps together. Due to the timing of their departure, the courtyard outside was packed with bustling bodies heading home or to class.

Amidst the crowd, they both spotted familiar faces. Nora Valkyrie's orange hair was pretty recognizable, as was her ever-present shadow in Lie Ren, after all. The two of them had been together since high school, always spending time with Pyrrha, one of the sweeter residents in their dorms.

"Are those two legally together?" Neptune pondered aloud as the couple walked by hand-in-hand.

Sun nodded, sipping loudly from his smoothie. "Yeah, Pyrrha got them to finally put something in stone."

Neptune whistled, impressed. "Damn. Is it that easy?"

Sun shrugged. "Apparently. Oh well. We were all expecting them to do it, anyways- now they've just got all the legal mumbo-jumbo out of the way."

Neptune hummed in response, trying to shove down the little sliver of jealously that bubbled up into his heart. In his mind's eye, he could so easily imagine himself and Weiss in place of Ren and Nora, his arm wrapped around Weiss' shoulders, her arm around his waist-

"Wait a second. That's it!" Sun stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes practically glowing in excitement as he spun on his heel. Grabbing Neptune's shoulders, he shook his friend, crying, "I've figured it out! Dude, we'll never have to worry again!"

"What are you talking about?" Neptune spluttered.

Sun pumped a fist into the air, skipping forward excitedly. "Dude, if getting married or being common law or whatever will give us reductions… why don't we just get married?"

Neptune rolled his eyes, chucking his empty candy bar wrapper at Sun's head. "To who, dumbass?"

And Sun smiled wickedly, and in that moment, Neptune felt more fear than he had ever felt in his life.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: These two are really fun to write. Leave a comment if you're reading along!

* * *

Inked

"And so you dumbasses decided to get _married?!_"

Sun flashed a wide smile, baring slightly fanged teeth proudly. Neptune, on the other hand, simply sighed, wishing he could sink into the floor and stay there permanently.

How had this all escalated so quickly?

The last few days had been a whirlwind of activity within their dorm room. With all of the energy they _should've _been dedicated to their actual schoolwork, Sun convinced Neptune to begin researching how to get marriage licenses. As it turned out, it was a fairly straightforward procedure in the city of Vale, only taking 48 hours to process all of the paperwork.

He just couldn't believe that Sun wanted them to get married… to _each other._

Sun wouldn't take no for an answer. "Dude, it'll be chill as hell!" he kept insisting in their shared apartment while messily painting a poster for their next community social. "We can get divorced afterwards, easy. Unless," and he paused, his dark eyes wide and hopeful for a moment, "you've got a better idea on how to pay for tuition next term?"

And so, Neptune was engaged.

Neptune was internally horrified at how quick the turnaround for it all was. He had barely sent Sun a link to the instructions before the other man was booking an appointment at City Hall for the weekend.

By the time Saturday came around, Sun dressed up in his best (a dress shirt with slightly-less ostentatious board shorts- the man had even managed to find a _tie _of all things, miraculously enough) and dragged Neptune to the office. And then, in a frenzied explanation (_yup, yes ma'am, we're so totally in love, we're going to be together forever and that's just __**great**_) the woman finally bought their story and laid out the necessary forms in front of them.

This was happening too fast. Didn't he need like… parental permission for this? Shouldn't an adult have popped in to say, "No, these boys are making a mistake! This is not a small decision, and they need not be so flippant about it!"

It was only after signing the forms and hearing the woman dryly say, "Congratulations; I now pronounce you partners to the end of your days," that Neptune realized, in quaking horror, that _he was the adult that should've rejected the idea._

Even now, three days later, the moment was still playing itself on repeat in the back of his mind- the city registrar watching them with a pointed look, the black fountain-ink pen in his trembling hand slipping a little within damp palms, the floral green lampshade sitting upon the office desk casting a sickly, unnatural hue onto the piercingly-white paperwork. Add a few piercing, dissonant string chords and it would be a horror movie.

_It's okay, _he thought to himself, a good thirty seconds away from a full-on panic attack as they hopped onto a city bus back to Beacon University. He flashed the driver his student pass, instinctively rolling his eyes when Sun stealthily slipped in from the second door without paying. The blond always forgot his student pass… _Either way, Sun promised that we'd keep this a secret, and that we're just using it till we graduate. Nothing more. No one will know-_

Which, of course, led to the situation today.

After unceremoniously dropping the news of their spur-of-the-moment wedding, Sun was _eating up _the reactions of their friends and students. "Look, filing taxes for being 'common law' or whatever took too much work so… yeah." Despite the looks of disbelief, shock, and utter confusion sent his way, the blond merely shrugged, unfazed. "Hey, the license was cheap, okay? Blame Vale for enabling us. It's like, fifty bucks."

Ruby's jaw was stuck onto the floor, silvery eyes wide in horror and confusion. "It's more expensive to get good pizza delivery here," she breathed in shock. "So… you… two… what… but- but- but-"

Yang sighed, sitting her younger sister down on the couch on their floor's lounge. "Now, now, little sister," she cooed, saccharine-sweet, "you see, when two men love each other very much-"

"Hey, we're not _actually _together," Sun protested, crossing his arms with a pout. "We're just… having fun with the system."

Pyrrha sighed, glancing up from her laptop. Despite being halfway through an essay, the redhead's face was covered in a facemask while Nora braided her hair. In a tense voice, she said, "You _know _that that could technically be-"

"Technically-schmechnically, Pyrrha!" Nora cried between each peal of laughter wracking her body. "Who cares? I say go for it! That's _genius_!"

"But Nora-"

"Sh! Don't speak too much, you're going to crack the clay!" Sitting upright, Nora threw a potato chip at Ren across the room. "But Ren, why didn't_ we_ get full licenses?"

Her partner sighed, glancing up from where he had been tutoring Yatsuhashi on matrices in the corner of the room. Brushing chip crumbs out of his hair, he said, "Nora, our parents didn't want us to get officially married so young-"

"Ooh, he wants to get officially married after! That is so sweet!" Velvet cooed, eliciting a proud smile from Nora and flushed cheeks from Ren.

Neptune groaned, elbowing his roommate-turned-husband lightly. "Dude, just _chill _about it, okay?" he hissed. Turning to everyone else, he winced against the intrigued, excited gazes of all of their friends. Quieter, he mumbled, "We're only doing this for the tuition…"

Sun slung an arm over his shoulder, grinning cheekily. "Yeah dude, just wait for those sweet, sweet deals to come in. I emailed the finances guy with that screenshot of Vale's registry and he said it was all good- he'll figure it out for us!"

"You know, if you're going to file it in your taxes, you should _probably _be living together, right?" Blake chuckled, her disbelief long having faded away into absolute amusement.

"Um, my good lady," Sun scoffed, bowing lightly in his seat, "do you forget that we've both been working in this hall for the last 3 years? As roommates?"

"You're such morons." "-geniuses!" Blake and Coco chimed in simultaneously.

"You just wish you had a piece of this," Sun shot back good-naturedly. "Don't be mad because we're gonna get better deals on tuition than you."

The two women simply rolled their eyes and continued working on their own laptops.

Thankfully, a buzzing alarm in Neptune's pocket caught his attention. _Finally! _Neptune jumped to his feet, dragging Sun with him to the door. It was 9 pm, meaning they had duties to attend. They did work in the dorms, after all. "Look, we're gonna go do rounds of the building or… something."

That was clearly the wrong thing to say, as the room immediately erupted into jeering catcalls and wolf-whistling. "Be safe!" "Use protection, lovebirds!" "Go celebrate your honeymoon!"

"So… you two are _actually _married now?" Weiss' voice, which had been staying out of the conversation up till then, was quiet, skeptical, and confused.

…Neptune really just wanted to sink into the floor and die.

The pale girl continued, "Are you even allowed to do that? And when you file with the same address, is that allowed, since you live together because of work? There's so many holes in this-"

Sun shushed her, waving off her concerns. "Relax, we'll figure it out! Stop asking questions. Unless," and the blond sighed dramatically, throwing his arms around Neptune's neck and pretending to collapse onto him, "you actually want to steal my husband from me?!"

Immediately, Neptune kicked his friend off of him, ignoring the cries of complaint from the blond. However, it was more than a little satisfying to see some of the incredulity transform into sheer amazement on Weiss' face, her nose and cheeks just a little pink at Sun's assertion.

_Maybe I still have a chance. _Either way, they had some rounds to do and a help desk to run. He could think about details later.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Halfway through the story, which is kind of wild. Leave a comment if you're reading along!

* * *

Inked

"Hey there, dear husband o' mine."

"I swear to _god, _Sun, I am going to-"

"Oh, relax," Scarlet chuckled, tossing a dishcloth at him, "be nicer to your _husband_."

Neptune glared at his old roommate immediately, removing the dishcloth from his forehead and hanging it on the nearest hook. However, the redhead's smug grin wasn't going away anytime soon, so he had no choice but to turn back to his current roommate-turned-best friend-turned-'partner'.

"What's up?" Neptune groaned, tapping his fingers against the countertop impatiently. To his surprise, Sun's face immediately switched from cocky and teasing to bashful, looking away embarrassedly. It was enough to make even Neptune's face heat up a bit. _What the hell is it, man?_

"Well… um…" Sun began clumsily, avoiding eye contact.

Scarlet scoffed behind Neptune as he frothed some milk for a customer's latte. "You two aren't _actually _dating, right-"

"_No, _Scarlet," Neptune hissed. He leaned forward onto the counter, pointing an accusatory finger up at Sun's downturned face. "Look, bro, you can't be doing this- it's been _weeks _and they're still going off about it constantly-"

"Chai tea latte, dude. Extra milk?" he rushed out.

Instantly, Neptune realized what his best friend wanted. He didn't know whether to be amused, proud, or offended.

It ended up coming out of his mouth as a bit of all three. "Dude, should I feel offended that you're trying to hit on Blake by bringing her _my tea?_"

"She likes the chai from here!" the blond protested, eyes shining as he pleaded, "C'mon, Neptune, help me out? I'll pay!"

Neptune grumbled, but it was in good fun. Sun had been trying to win over Blake by buying her tea and snacks for years. It hadn't worked yet. "Maybe if you didn't spend your money buying girls stuff, you'd be able to pay for-"

Sun clapped him on the shoulder, barrelling right over whatever he wanted to say. "Amazing, thanks! I can always count on you." Now considerably perked up, the man slapped the cash down in front of Neptune and sauntered over to the pick-up counter, whistling cheerily as he wanted for the latte.

Scarlet hummed behind him as Neptune slumped over, prepping the drink as ordered. "Your husband's cheating on you," the shorter man sang airily, easily dodging the rag thrown back in his direction.

Neptune rolled his eyes at the jab, but realistically, he didn't really mind. After all, it was three weeks after the paperwork had been signed, and he didn't really feel much different. It wasn't like they were broadcasting their 'relationship' to the world- Pyrrha and Weiss and _everyone _had gotten on their case about how to avoid being tried for tax evasion, because apparently this whole plan was _potentially _ illegal?- so he wasn't too concerned. And, with their relationship officially (and legally) recognized by Beacon, they were set with the FAO to have a reduced tuition payment for the following term.

So, despite just how stupid the wholes scheme was… Sun had technically been the one to solve their tuition issue. For that, he deserved _some _credit.

The only one who had actually been upset had been their mothers- Neptune's, to be specific. Sun's parents had laughed and laughed and laughed, and then immediately not asked any questions. The blond's carefree nature had had to come from somewhere, after all.

His own parents, on the other hand, were much less pleased. "Why in the world did we get a _marriage license _in the mail?!" his mother cried on the phone two weeks after the ceremony. "And to _Sun?! _I _told _you that boy wasn't a good influence, I don't _care _if he helped you get that RA job, but-"

"Mom, mom, it's fine-" he had attempted, but the woman had listened to none of it.

After hanging up the phone at the end of that call, Neptune had been left worn and haggard- far worse than the aftermath of any finals season he had ever experienced before. _No wonder Sun didn't think twice about this whole thing- his parents don't care, _he had pondered glumly as he prepared to go to campus café for his evening shift. _I probably shouldn't've given my Mistral address to the office…_

However, the marriage was done, and there was nothing his parents could do about it. So, Neptune just made a mental note to use whatever money was left over after paying his reduced tuition to buy his mother a very, _very _nice gift. He'd get Scarlet to help pick it out- it would be fine.

All-in-all, over time, the thought of their impromptu 'wedding' became nothing more than an odd fever dream. Even before the paperwork was signed, his friends had always joked that he and his best friend were like a married couple. Living together for that many years had that effect on people. So, Neptune brushed it to the back of his mind, instead focusing his energy on his exams, his café job, and, of course, the Winter Formal.

The first weekend of December finally arrived, and the event itself look wonderful. Right before the exam season, all of the students were excited for one last party. So, everywhere he looked, there were suits and ties and beautiful dresses hugging all the right curves. It was a success by all measures.

As one of the organizers, Neptune's role was to stay near the kitchen in case the catering company needed any assistance. There was one drawback to his vantage point- it was achingly clear that Weiss and her friends were nowhere near the event. Despite the bustling crowd of almost two hundred students in the large hall, he couldn't see her anywhere. Her absence was only confirmed by checking her social media feed, where she had posted with her friends from her father's high-society event.

So, it was more than a bit of a shock when Sun came over from his station guarding the drinks. "What's up, man?" he asked as the blond approached.

Sun explained, "Well, 'cause Weiss and Blake aren't here, I thought we could hang."

"Glad I'm the second option, dude."

"Don't say that! I have something even better." There was an oddly manic glint to Sun's eyes, one that immediately terrified and intrigued Neptune. He murmured, "Pyrrha brought Jaune."

Neptune's eyes immediately snapped open, excitement filling every pore. Jaune Arc was the clumsiest idiot to ever disgrace their recurring, giant weekend board game sessions. A good guy, and totally head-over-heels for Pyrrha, but the guy was a total ditz compared to his track-star-girlfriend even after a year of dating.

"We're bullying them?"

Sun held out a fist. "We're bullying them." It was with affection, after all. So, Neptune bumped his fist against Sun's, made sure the caterers were set, and promptly joined Sun in his search for their favourite clumsy couple.

Before they got too far, however, Sun suddenly grabbed his hand. Neptune immediately frowned, suspicious, as Sun's smirk was too chaotic to lead to anything good.

He was right to be suspicious. In a few moments, Sun had whipped out a small plastic package from his pocket, ripped it open, and painfully jammed plastic on Neptune's ring finger.

Neptune quickly let out a few expletives before glaring at Sun. "What the hell was that for, dude-" And just like that, his words disappeared. Sun Wukong had jammed a Ring Pop candy onto his ring finger. And, to Neptune's horror, he was already wearing one himself.

The blond winked. "Gotta 'claim' my husband, right?" Sun said mockingly, the mirth in his eyes clear.

Neptune groaned. "Dude- people are gonna see! We're trying to keep this low-key-"

"Neptune, _relax,_" his friend insisted, pushing him through the crowd. "Literally no one is paying attention- it's all good!" Jokingly, he added, "Besides. No one can see our tats- how are we going to _flaunt our love?"_

As Neptune glanced around, he realized with a start (and a groan, because dammit he still couldn't believe he got a tattoo with Sun before all of this happened) that Sun was indeed correct- no one was even looking up at the RA duo, having long become accustomed to seeing the two and their silly antics around the dorms for the past few years. No one cared. It didn't matter.

He tried out the Ring Pop. It was blue raspberry flavoured- his favourite (it was actually Sun's favourite, but he'd long since given up trying to get the blond to buy other flavours of candy for their apartment, so over time it had become his too). _I guess this isn't the worst… _

He glanced over at Sun once they finally took a moment to breathe, searching for the friends among the event-goers. The blond's smile was wide and relaxed, his eyes bright and excited as he glanced around the room dramatically. Neptune felt a smile creep up onto his lips, oddly proud of the handsome blond.

His best friend was an idiot, but hey- what else was new? _Might as well just go with it, I guess._

And so, he spent the rest of the night enjoying his Ring Pop, managing the event, and teasing Pyrrha and Jaune. It wasn't what he had been expecting, for sure. But, it would have been a lie to say that, by the end of the night, Neptune_ hadn't_ decided the Winter Formal was the best event he'd ever organized, Ring Pop and all.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Update 2 today. Enjoy!

* * *

Inked

"Dude, is the internet down?" Sun hollered in panic.

Neptune craned his head upwards from his spot, lying practically upside-down on the couch, trying to look up at his roommate sitting at the kitchen table. Sun was clearly freaked out, tapping furiously at his laptop. "It's working for me," Neptune replied calmly, holding up his screen for the blond to see. "Can you not log on?"

"Ugh, no," Sun groaned, slipping down off his chair dramatically. "I gotta pay this-"

"Chill. It'll be fine."

Suddenly, Sun perked up, righting himself on the chair. "Never mind, it's working!"

Neptune grinned, flashing the other a thumbs up. "Let's see if the amounts are different."

Sun nodded resolutely. "In 3…"

"2…"

"1… check!"

And with that, the two boys opened up their online student accounts, ready to take in whatever numerical value higher education was going to curse them with.

It was silent.

"…_Fuck yes!" "Hell yeah, dude!" _they both suddenly cheered, holding up their laptop screens for the other to see the same message mirrored in full:

_Direct payment setup of tuition accepted. You have no outstanding fees. _

Quickly popping open his online bank account, Sun wolf-whistled at his screen. "And I can actually afford textbooks, too!"

Neptune sat upright on the couch, slamming his computer shut. "We did it, man," he grinned, winking at his roommate. "Look at my husband, figuring out how to pay the bills."

"Just for you, man," Sun winked back cheekily before the two doubled over in laughter.

_I can't believe it actually worked. Tuition is paid, we're graduating on time… it's gonna be okay, _Neptune thought in sheer disbelief, running his fingers through his hair. His scalp was damp with sweat, the nervousness which had built up to seeing the tuition statement finally dissipating. Letting out a heavy sigh of relief, the tension from his shoulders easing at last, he glanced over at his best friend.

Sun was an idiot, for sure, but the man had figured out a way for them to pull through. _I might not need to pick up extra shifts at the café after all. _The very thought sent a giddy bolt up his spine, the joyful grin spilling out onto his face. The concern over his tuition had lingered for long enough that it had become a shadow looming over him- and now that it was gone, and his final round of tuition was paid… he felt free.

He fondly looked over Sun's equally-vibrant form. The blond was currently dancing shirtless in the kitchen, setting forth on a mission to make his favourite mac and cheese now that their tuition woes were cleared up. Goofily swaying in front of their tiny two-burner stove, Sun was clearly lost in his own little world while he pulled all of his ingredients together, giving a clear view of the blond's tattoo to Neptune. The marks had healed over perfectly, the black and brown emblem on his shoulder blade standing out against perfectly-tanned skin. Despite the symbol itself being a little silly (in Neptune's opinion- to Sun, it was still the coolest thing ever) there was no denying that it was very well done.

A small, wistful sigh escaped Neptune's lips. _I hope my tattoo looks as good as that._

A knock at the door pulled them out of their own worlds. Neptune sprang up to open it, ready to deal with student concerns- that was the only reason anyone ever knocked on their door, after all.

To his surprise and utter embarrassment, it was Weiss and Ruby. The latter held up a box excitedly, practically shoving it in Neptune's face as she cried, "Look what Jaune got for this Saturday! You're coming to Saturday Smash, right?"

_Of course they're here to talk about game day. _Recovering from his initial surprise, Neptune leaned suavely against the doorframe, winking at the two shorter women. "Of course," he murmured, gaze lingering on Weiss. "When do we ever miss an opportunity to crush you losers in board games?"

Weiss rolled her eyes, feigning boredom- but Neptune could see the smile that was fighting to cross her face. "Who knows, you two might just do something else _crazy _on a Saturday morning. Adopt a kid?"

"I'd be a good dad! Tripitaka is doing well-" Sun called from the stove.

"Your sad little aloe plant doesn't count!" Weiss retorted, but she was smiling in full now, and Neptune wanted to melt at the sight.

Returning his attention to the girls, Neptune asked, "So, what's the game?"

Ruby shrugged, flipping the box over to read the description. "Honestly, I dunno. I figure it'll be good, though. I know we need partners for it."

Immediately, his eyes darted up to Weiss'. "Partners, eh?" he offered, leaving the unspoken question hanging in the air. He always partnered up with Weiss when he could- she had yet to turn him down.

And yet, Weiss' lips pressed into a grim line. "Sorry, Neptune," she responded with a shrug, "but this brat already called it."

"It's a game for bestest friends, and so, we're gonna beat you!" Ruby cried defiantly, giving up on reading the instructions.

The young man froze, barely processing the news. "You… Weiss?"

"It's okay!" Ruby chirped, patting him on the shoulder whilst completely unaware of his inner shock. "You and Sun can be together."

"Hell yeah, dude! We'll crush it," Sun yelled encouragingly from the kitchen.

"Cook your food!" Neptune cried back, eyes still on Weiss.

Ruby crossed her arms, looking as smug as can be. "It's all good. I know Jaune and Pyrrha and Nora and Ren are coming, and Neo is coming too-"

"And Roman Torchwick-"

Ruby's face fell instantly into a glower. "-and _Roman Torchwick,_" and she shuddered, angry just at the thought of the boy with whom she had developed an odd little rivalry with since her first year. "Coco and her friends are coming, too. It'll be fun! But…" She paused, contemplating something. "You're supposed to know your partner really well, so… won't you and Sun be at an advantage-"

"The relationship's fake, dummy!" scolded Weiss with a light smack to Ruby's shoulder.

The shorter girl recoiled. "Hey! They're still BFFs though, and I'm not wrong- even all our profs agree that-"

"I'm sorry," Neptune interjected, "but your profs agree to _what?_"

Ruby's wide eyes blinked back at him, confused. "They agree that you're good together! Professor Oobleck said it was only a matter of time till you two-"

"Why does Professor Oobleck- or _anyone- _know about-" and he gestured frantically between himself and the kitchen hidden around the corner, "-us?"

In a blink of an eye, Ruby's expression shifted into guilt. "I… maybe have talked to Uncle Qrow about it-"

Neptune groaned. "You weren't supposed to talk to anyone, let alone the _head of the Crim department-_"

"I'm sorry, okay?" she squeaked. "It was an accident, and he's my Uncle! I forgot..."

He sighed, leaning against the doorframe out of exhaustion this time. People knew about his 'marriage'? But… it was done as a joke! He wasn't even gay…

"At least," Ruby said sheepishly, "everyone thinks that you're cute together?"

At that, Weiss groaned and waved goodbye, citing homework that needed doing as their excuse for leaving the poor RA alone in his doorway.

_People know that we got married? People think we're 'cute'? _He hadn't even considered the possibility that people- like, real, _actual _people- would take it seriously. _People think that we're good together?_

And then, another thought struck. _…Why didn't she say that anyone was surprised by it? I'm- I'm not-_

Heart thoroughly shaken, Neptune closed the door and went into the bedroom, throwing himself onto messy blankets and shoving his head underneath a pillow. Why wasn't anyone who didn't know the context of their 'wedding' surprised that he and his best friend- both of whom were _totally straight, thank you very much_\- got married?

He didn't eat any of Sun's mac and cheese that day. It worried Sun- Neptune loved his mac and cheese- but Neptune had _a lot_ of thinking to do.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: What a wild world we live in, eh? I hope you're all doing well amidst the pandemic. Don't hesitate to reach out if you need to chat :)

This chapter also feels a lot like my fic _Deviations. _Similar levels of 'more serious bro starts looking at idiot bro in a different way'. Fewer aliens.

Let me know what you think!

* * *

Inked

If anyone were to ask Neptune about his shift in behaviour, he'd deny it outright. Nothing was going on. He was just studying for his exams a little harder than usual, that was all. Why else would this incredibly-friendly human be locking himself up in his room, avoiding anyone and everyone in his community whenever he was off-duty?

No one believed it- not even himself. His residents were mildly concerned after not seeing him around in their lounge for days at a time. The person who was understandably the most distraught, however, was Sun.

"Talk to me, dude!" Neptune heard Sun murmur again and again by his door whenever Neptune insisted, yet again, that he couldn't go hang out because of exams.

Neptune only had three finals that semester. Sun knew that fact. And he tried bringing it up every single time they had to man the front desk together- every set of rounds and every work meeting was full of a mix of accusatory and worried glares from his roommate.

Neptune couldn't say anything to him. Hell, he could barely look his roommate in the eyes. How could he?! Apparently the way they had acted all this time signaled that they were soulmates or something, and he wasn't prepared for any of that!

Every single time he saw Sun, though, he regretted the way he was acting. Sun always looked hurt. The blond always had been more sensitive about things like that deep down. _I'm sorry, man. I just… I can't._

He didn't want to hurt his best friend. He would never want to hurt Sun.

Still, he kept giving that weak excuse (_it's just exams, Sun needs to calm down, this is totally normal behaviour, I'm just studying)_, praying that if he repeated it enough, maybe he'd get over what had truly been bothering him: the fact that everyone seemed unsurprised by the announcement of his sudden wedding to his best friend. Why didn't anyone care? Why wasn't anyone surprised?

Why did even their professors think that he and Sun looked good together?!

He had confirmed it when going to chat with Professor Ozpin, the head of his department, during office hours. When the older man saw the ring upon his finger, he barely batted an eyelash. Neptune immediately froze upon seeing the man's eyes dart between his ring and his desk, a subtle grin gracing his face.

"You… heard?" he murmured.

Professor Ozpin simply smiled. "You two make a good pair. I'm happy you've managed to find one another."

The young man deflated. _So… everyone really _does _think that we're meant to be together. I…_

He just didn't know what to say. How could he?

_Weiss also thinks me and Sun are 'good together'… how do I convince her otherwise?_

The girl didn't blush when she spoke to him anymore.

_…Can I even change her mind?_

And so, all he could do was play video games in his room, study when the procrastination led to too much anxiety, and sneak out of his bedroom to sneak snacks from the kitchen without his roommate seeing.

…He missed Sun's smile.

Work, however, was still the one inevitability where he had to speak with Sun. He had been avoiding it as much as possible, trying to switch shifts and ensure that he was always assigned to different duties. With it being the last weekend before the winter break, he was almost scot-free- he could spend the next few weeks in their dorm room, enjoying Beacon University's relative silence whilst Sun went home to visit family.

_Almost _scot-free. Not quite.

However, not all weekends were so flexible, and he wasn't able to switch anything around that weekend. So, when he found a thick stack of posters tucked inside of their supervisor's office, just waiting for him and Sun to affix to every flat surface possible so the students could read them, Neptune could only groan and sigh and paste on a miserable little smile for his boss. Putting up posters took so much time- how many chances would Sun have to grill him about his silence while they worked?

_Maybe I can convince him to tackle half the building while I get the other?_

It was a futile thought. He and Sun always put up all their posters together. They had a playlist built for it and everything- Sun would never agree to do it individually.

So, Neptune begrudgingly brought back the stack of posters to the welcome desk where he and Sun would be stationed for the next few hours, handing over the roll of duct tape and the stack nervously. "We gotta get these up," he murmured, hopping onto the counter and swinging his legs to the other side.

"Hey to you, too, man." Sun took the material from him wordlessly, placing it down onto the table before leaning back in his rolling chair, crossing his arms over his chest.

Neptune gulped- he could just feel the blond's narrowed, accusing gaze boring holes into him. "Pass me the tape?"

"I gotchu, dude," Sun murmured. Neptune winced in response, keeping his eyes focused on the stack of posters. He could _feel _the hurt in Sun's voice.

Still, they had to get the posters taped and plastered all around the building, so they got to work- Sun ripping him off tape loops, and Neptune placing them on all corners of each poster. They worked like clockwork, never missing a beat (except when Sun had to pause in order to sing along to their playlist, although Neptune noted regretfully that his voice was lacking all the oomph and gusto it normally possessed) until they were halfway through the pile.

And then, Neptune dropped a poster.

Immediately, Sun leaned down to pick it up, as did Neptune. The two met face-to-face, leaning towards the ground, hands reaching for the same cardstock poser about some shuttlebus route change. And they both looked up.

And right in front of Neptune's eyes, Sun's dark gaze melted into an instinctively-teasing smile, his straight nose mere inches from Neptune's, tanned skin still managing to glow beautifully despite the sickly fluorescent lighting, blond hair messy and ruffled and _perfect _to run your fingers through_, _his Adam's apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed, breathing out through bitten parted lips, the movements dragging Neptune's eyes down the curve of an angular collarbone into dense, toned muscle and smooth pecs and that damn hemp necklace that Neptune had made for him as a joke on a leadership retreat one time in second year-

_Fuck._

…Sun was attractive.

_Fuck, I-_

Sun Wukong was attractive.

_No fucking way, this-_

Sun Wukong, his _roommate, _was attractive.

_Nope, no, I can't-_

And Neptune was _attracted _to him- Sun Wukong. His roommate.

His _husband._

_Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, __**fuck-**_

So he ran.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Only 1 more left! I'm excited to move onto other projects.

Leave a comment if you're reading along!

* * *

Inked

His escape from Sun had not gone particularly well, to no one's surprise. His roommate had chased him halfway around the entirety of their dormitory, but after a while, Sun had given up. Neptune didn't know when the blond had decided to let him go, but when Neptune finally glanced behind him, Sun was gone.

And when he returned after doing solo rounds that night, Sun didn't open his door to say goodnight like he always did.

So, life moved on. And Neptune suffered for it. His last exam was a bit of a mess, but he didn't care- he had earned enough in the class already to pass it, even with a disaster of a final. There were more important things to worry about.

Sun, for one.

Ever since that night, every time he saw his roommate, Sun was distant. He painted on a pained smile and, without any exams to worry about, continued working, because despite being an idiot, Sun Wukong hadn't been kept around in their offices for no reason. He spoke to everyone with a smile, helped resolve roommate conflicts, broke up undo partying (except when Blake was involved, of course) and comforted those who had messed up on their exams. Sun kept busy.

And every time he saw his roommate attempting to maintain normalcy, Neptune wanted to cry out- wanted to rush after him, explain himself, beg for Sun to reach out to him and chase him again. But Sun wouldn't respond- he only tried to talk to Neptune when work necessitated it.

That last week of their exams was a cold, lonely week for Neptune, and all the young man could do was watch his roommate's retreating figure whenever they crossed paths and wonder where it all went wrong. Had it been the posters? Had it been when Ruby and Weiss told him what they thought of his 'marriage'? Or maybe this frustrating rift between him and Sun had been developing slowly, ever since the day of the wedding- maybe even the day of the idea's conception, the day of Sun's haphazard 'proposal'.

Neptune sighed, shaking his head in weariness as he walked towards the café. He wasn't on shift- he just needed to pick up his paycheque. The place was closed over the winter solstice break, after all, so he had nothing to do but go get money he'd use for gifts this year. He owed his mother something big after the unexpected wedding, after all.

As he walked in, he waved at Scarlet behind the register who flashed him a thumbs-up, already aware of why he was visiting. While Neptune waited for his friend to find his cheque for him, an unexpected voice caught his attention. "What're you doing here, Neptune?" Blake asked, eyes narrowed and brow furrowed.

Neptune froze, caught in the act by Weiss, Blake, Pyrrha and Ren's stares, ranging from accusatory to bewildered to concerned. He had found them in the café's study area, the place packed and buzzing with the last few people desperate to get the last few exams of the season over and done with. The group watched him warily. He hadn't spent much time with anyone in a few weeks.

Putting on a sheepish grin as he swallowed down the guilt, Neptune chuckled, "Oh, hey guys. I'm just picking up my last paycheque. What's… what's up? How's the study sesh going? Isn't it distracting with everyone here?"

Pyrrha smiled, the concern in her eyes never leaving. "We're almost free!" she replied, all fake-cheer and fatigue. "The smell of coffee is good. It will give us energy."

Neptune bit back a smile. Judging from their sleepy faces, it seemed like the tense, thrumming atmosphere of the café was doing anything but. Still, it was their choice.

Just as it was Sun's choice to sneak up behind Neptune, startling the boy by placing a gentle hand onto his shoulder. "Hey, dude," Sun said, a strained grin on his face. It lacked all of its usual luster as he looked into Neptune's eyes. It was enough to drive a stake into Neptune's gut. "How… how's it going?"

Neptune couldn't respond for a moment, too focused on the heat of Sun's large hand squeezing his shoulder. His hand slipped down, and for a moment, it rested upon Neptune's tattoo. It shouldn't have felt like anything- just an innocuous touch.

But underneath layers of jackets and sweaters to combat the winter chill, his skin _burned _underneath Sun's touch_._

His face heated up, and he dragged his attention back to Sun-'s face, eyes catching the pallor of the blond's usually-tanned skin. How long had it been since he had been face-to-face with Sun? _Only a few days, _his mind supplied wearily, but he didn't care- it had felt like an eternity without his best friend. Sun looked almost like a different creature to him- his dark eyes were circled by fatigue and disappointment, messy blond hair drooping into his face in such a pathetic way that Neptune had to fight off the urge to push it back for Sun. He couldn't, though, and instead just clenched his fist at his side.

Sun's smile was weak. He licked his lips (_they're so chapped- did that idiot lose his lip balm? He _always _loses it) _and shrugged, pulling his hand back from Neptune's shoulder. "You… heading back to the dorm?"

"Uh… yeah, I guess. Just… need my paycheque first," Neptune chuckled awkwardly.

Right on cue, Scarlet approached them, weaving through the crowd of patrons and holding out Neptune's earnings with two fingers. "I told the boss you came by and grabbed it so you're good to go." Their manager who was working behind the counter waved at Neptune from a distance, acknowledging the transaction before turning back to the next customer.

Neptune waved back, tucking the cheque into his wallet wearily. To Scarlet, he murmured, "Thanks, dude. I'll head out now then."

"Wait!" Sun protested, much to his surprise. The blond shot out his left hand, grabbing onto Neptune's arm before the other boy could make his escape.

Startled, Neptune paused. "What-" and he glanced down at the hand holding him back.

There was a ring on that hand. The fourth finger, to be precise.

Sun couldn't call him back before Neptune shoved his wallet back into his pocket and shuffled out of there as fast as he could.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: The triggering prompt was essentially "we got married for cheaper tuition and it's genius cuz everything was platonic but holy shit I don't think I've ever noticed how beautiful your eyes are and HOLY SHIT I LOVE THIS CHEAPER TUITION YUP EVERYTHING IS FINE" or something to that effect. I never wrote it down, unfortunately.

Last chapter! Let me know what you think.

* * *

Inked

Neptune didn't know how long he sat upon that couch in his dim living room. How could he move? How could he think? What was he supposed to do?

_We just wanted cheaper tuition- is he serious? Did he actually mean it? I figured we'd just get a divorce or something- so why is it like this all of a sudden?_

And since when did Sun start wearing a fucking _ring?_

_Maybe this all started with the tattoo. _He paused, picturing the image which was imprinted on his shoulder- a small trident in a shield to represent his namesake. Sun had gotten his Monkey King tattoo for the same reason. Yes, it had been a dare- yes, it had been painful- yes, Yang had blackmail photos of him crying-

But Sun had held his hand and smiled at him through it all. Maybe_ that_ was when this thing had all started.

The front door creaked open slowly, a thin sliver of light coming in from the hallway indicating what he'd been dreading. "Neptune- dude, you there?" Sun's wary voice called from the foyer.

Neptune grunted in return, still pensively seated upon the edge of the couch. He didn't dare to look up.

He could hear Sun's plodding footsteps echo through the silent room. "Hey man. You okay?"

"…Been better," he admitted at last.

"…did I fuck up?"

"No." The words were out of his mouth before he could think twice. That was, after all, the undeniable truth that he had to come to terms with- Sun _hadn't _done anything wrong. Neptune was the one who had fucked up.

What else could he call it? He thought of Sun as attractive. He was straight- hell, he'd been crushing on Weiss for _years _now, and he'd never felt attracted to any dude before. Yeah, Sun had always been attractive objectively, but that was okay. He had also always just been his best friend, and nothing more.

But now, everything was different.

_He _thought Sun was attractive_. Really _attractive, as it turned out- over the course of the last week, even just by scrolling through photos of their silly antics over the years, Neptune had found himself feeling more and more at a loss every time he saw the other boy's joyous face.

He was attracted to Sun. It wasn't Sun's fault.

_This is gonna mess everything up, isn't it?_

The dread of losing him hurt more than anything, and Neptune didn't know what to do to fix it.

The couch dipped downwards beside Neptune, and out of the corner of his downturned vision he could see Sun's foot nervously tapping next to his. "You… Man, you've been avoiding me lately."

"Yeah." Neptune sighed heavily, running his hands over his face. "Yeah. Sorry about that."

"But why?!" Sun shifted to bring one leg onto the couch in order to face Neptune, and the boy flinched with the proximity. "Did I do something? It can't have been nothing!"

"Just- leave it-"

"No." Sun roughly grabbed his shoulders and twisted him sideways to face the blond, preventing Neptune from escaping his iron grip. "You need to tell me what's up right now. I'm not playing the waiting game any longer."

"I don't know what you want-"

"How would you _know _what I want- you don't even know what _you _want!"

Neptune winced. "…Yikes, man, lay off it."

"I'm not." At that, Sun shifted so that he was seated cross-legged on the couch facing him, expression troubled. "You ran away back there. Why?"

"I don't know-"

"You _do _know-"

"Fuck off, I-"

"Just tell me!"

"No, back off-" He shoved Sun backwards, sending the boy sprawling onto his back along the couch. Chest heaving, Neptune just closed his eyes and stood up, trying to calm himself down.

_He looks upset. _He had every right to be upset. The thought only filled Neptune with more despair- how could he be hurting his best friend like this?

_You won't be friends for long if you tell him._

Angrily, Sun righted himself. "Spill it, you asshole," he spat. "Why did you run? Why have you been avoiding me all this time? If I haven't done anything then-"

"I think I love you."

Sun froze, eyes wide. For a moment, his mouth just opened and closed, his brain slowly catching up with the words just shared. It was clear when he finally understood it, though- Sun's face, from the tips of his ears all the way to past the neckline of his shirt, flushed pink.

When the blond still didn't respond after a few minutes of tense silence, Neptune sighed, running fingers through hair long-since mussed due to anxiety. "Fuck it. I'm leaving-"

"No, wait!" Sun scrambled to his feet, reaching out to grab his hand. His voice was pleading, desperate. "Dude, are you serious?"

"Why would I say it if I wasn't?" Neptune groaned. "Look, I dunno- I _think _I _like _you at least, and it's just- it's a lot. I'll just… go."

Sun skirted around him to stand between him and the door. "You should've told me earlier, man." His voice was soft, his face twisted with a mixture of confusion and regret and what Neptune could only describe as… elation?

"Why-"

And then, Sun kissed him.

It was the clumsiest kiss he had ever experienced- hell, even the few sloppy kisses he'd had with Weiss (although she'd never admit it, it 'wasn't proper') while drunk in their first year had been better- but all Neptune could focus on was _him. _The scent and the taste and everything about how the other's muscular body fit perfectly into his arms, the hands cupping his face the perfect size to hold him close, the long blond eyelashes Neptune could see resting upon lightly freckled cheeks just millimetres away barely brushing flushed cheeks… everything felt familiar. It felt right.

There weren't any sparks. No fanfare, no big procession. It just… felt like Sun. And he liked that.

Neptune was stunned, barely able to move long after Sun finally let him go, taking a long, ragged breath in- what? Fear? Arousal? Anticipation? He didn't know.

Sun leaned back in.

"No, dude!" Neptune squirmed away, striding across the room until he had put the kitchen table between himself and Sun. Why, he didn't know- but it had to be better than being next to Sun.

_That's a lie. You liked that kiss, _his traitorous heart insisted. His mind, however, was screaming.

Wasn't he supposed to be straight? And not in love with his best friend?

And _not _having his feelings _apparently reciprocated?!_

_You're also not supposed to be a husband, but here we are, _a small voice offered amidst all of his confusion.

He was losing his fucking mind.

Sun looked hurt beyond belief. "What the hell, dude, what's wrong-"

"What's wrong?" Neptune's eyebrows shot to his forehead. "What's wrong is you _kissed me! _Don't mess with me, man! I didn't think you were that low- you're not into me, so why?"

"Did- did you-" Sun's disbelief rang through Neptune's very core. "Did you really think I'd marry you just to get an exemption for tuition?"

The stunned look in his eyes caught Neptune's attention. "…yes?"

"Fuckin' A, man." Sun walked forward, his arms wrapping around Neptune's waist- solid, strong. It was a sensation so unlike what he imagined it would feel like to be with Weiss. There was no delicacy, no grace to Sun's touch. "You're worth more than that."

_He's… serious._

Neptune blushed despite himself, hiding the heat in his cheeks and ears by ducking his head down. There wasn't anywhere to go, though- not really. "Since when?" he mumbled at last, feeling drained.

Sun shrugged. "I don't know. I just… realized that I liked you a while back."

"Before or after the wedding?"

Sun blushed. "After… I think."

"You think?!"

Sun shrugged defensively, looking cornered as Neptune advanced, demanding an explanation. "I don't know! I thought it was all normal, and then after we got those tattoos Blake cornered me one day and I asked her out on a date, and-and she told me to ask you out and I didn't know why, and she called me an idiot so I went for a run and did some soul-searching or some shit and then-"

"Breathe," Neptune interjected, watching the boy in his arms fall apart.

Sun sighed. "I don't know, dude. Blake told me I should stop trying to use her as my beard for you." He snorted. "I… always thought I liked her, and she liked me too, but-"

"But she thinks we're apparently better for each other?"

The blond grinned toothily, a little bit of his old glow entering his expression again. "Yeah. Apparently."

Neptune let out a heavy breath, tilting his head back to stare at the dim fluorescent light fixture illuminating their tiny kitchen. "…I guess you liked me first then, huh? I only realized it last week."

To his surprise, Sun snorted. "As _if. _You've been hot for me for _years, _you just never had the guts to-"

Neptune punched him in the shoulder, satisfaction lancing through him as the blond winced and recoiled a little. "Shut up, dude. Your head's gonna explode one day from that ego."

"You wouldn't have me any other way."

And the embarrassment was back.

Sun's fingers slid up to Neptune's shoulder blade, pressing against the tattoo. Quietly, with his other hand, he reached up and grabbed Neptune's left hand. "I wouldn't get a tattoo with someone I didn't intend to stand beside. I, uh- I got you this, too."

The simple ring that Sun slid onto his finger fit perfectly. Neptune didn't even need to see it to know what it was. At that, Neptune's throat let out a little squeak despite himself. "Fuck off, dude, you said it was just-"

"And then we got married, so my point still stands," Sun insisted.

"You actually bought a ring, though."

Sun's grin was nothing but sheepish and earnest. "Hey, Weiss and Blake helped me pick it out, so… at least we've got fans?"

"…you're an idiot." Neptune glanced up. Sun was just as red as he himself felt. _At least we're both way out of our element here. _"So… what now?" he murmured, bringing his eyes to meet Sun's at last. "Are we dating, or something?"

"…dude, we're already married."

"Oh. Shit. Yeah."

It was silent.

"…you make breakfast tomorrow?"

Neptune barked out a laugh. "Nah, no way, I'm pretty sure it's _your _turn to burn eggs. I cooked last time we ate together."

"I'm pretty sure you didn't," Sun teased. And, as the blond dragged him close for another clumsy, hesitant, far-too-timid-to-be-Sun-Wukong kiss, Neptune realized that he really didn't mind- not as long as that ring sat on his finger, that silly tattoo on his shoulder representing a stupid moment in his life still engrained in his skin. This was new, and they weren't sure how to be in an actual relationship, but that ring would stay on him always. The ink on his skin would, too.

_**-fin-**_

* * *

I hope you enjoyed this story! It was a lot of fun to write. Leave a review and let me know what you think of these silly boys, and I'll see you all around in my other works! :)

Ongoing RWBY works:

_What We Call Home _(Renora Canon V4-6 Retelling)

_Moments in Time _(Arkos and Renora oneshots)

_Calling Bluffs _(Arkos College AU)

_Blue and Red and Grey Duvets _(Merkos and Arkos College AU)

_Excuse Me, Professor _(Grad School AU)

_Touch the Sky _(Mercury V1-6 Retelling)

Ongoing Kingdom Hearts work:

_Right Amount of Sugar_


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